Disappointments and Success

I’ve been avoiding writing this. While I have some good things to report, I have two major disappointments to air out. Normally I like to report the positives first, but just for today I want to delve right into the dark side. As I sit here, I know I will not achieve two of my goals for the close of 2007. I’m not all doom and gloom but I am especially disappointed in myself for not meeting the goal of completing 95% of my workouts. The last three weeks have been a total train wreck of my training plan. First I bailed out on my swim workouts, then I collapsed my bike training, and finally I lost 2 or 3 run workouts over the past 4 weeks. It all started with a scheduled recovery week when I cut out two entire days of training. Then the following week, everything seemed to get in the way of training. Work meetings, family obligations, holiday prep, you name it, it became a bigger priority than what was previously scheduled. I just fell apart. Stuff happens, I know it and I usually don’t dwell on it, but there are a few reasons that this is bothering me.
First, I know that this piece is critical to my racing success next season. If I don’t get 95% of my scheduled workouts in, I have no shot at achieving my best.
Second, I feel like I let myself down. I had 100% control over achieving this goal. I just had to show up and I didn’t.
Lastly, It is partially because I didn’t achieve this goal that I won’t achieve another goal.

The other goal I won’t achieve is a sub 90-minute 15K. I know, I haven’t run the race yet, but unfortunately I estimate my finish time at closer to 92 minutes. My previous ramble not withstanding, I’m less disappointed about not making this goal. I have raced some of my best times in the past few weeks. I PR’ed at the 5 miler and just finished a 4 miler at a pace of 9:17/mile. Again, in perspective, I began the year running a half marathon at a 12 minute per mile pace. I did continue to run and do my speed workouts over the past few weeks even though I dropped everything else. I’m open to the possibility that I’m wrong here and I fully intend to race my ass off on Saturday, but a 9:30 pace may be out of my reach. This is complicated, but missing my shot at a sub 90 was partially due to the demise of my training schedule, it is also due to my achieving another goal!

This is where the mood picks up a bit.

My goal of achieving an optimal body composition looks like it is within my reach! I have worked really hard at following the Paleo Diet to shed the extra weight. My weight peaked at about 167 pounds this year, as of this morning I am 146 pounds and my bodyfat is at 25%. I am extremely excited about this! The diet is hard. Very hard. It’s also working. My weight loss has absolutely contributed to my enhanced speed, but my diet has been counterproductive to my performance gains. I believe that a calorie and carb restricted diet and training to race don’t mix well. Here’s a quick Thanksgiving story to highlight this piece of knowledge.

Every Thanksgiving, there is one family member who tries to drag me into a political, religious, or social debate, knowing full well that our beliefs could not be more polar opposite. This year I was determined not to take the bait, even when Smedley (not his real name) told the same stupid Hillary Clinton joke he told last year, twice in a twenty minute time span. Then the table began discussing weight (like after we gorged ourselves?! Go figure.). My family was very complimentary of me, then Smedley chimed in, “All you have to do is to exercise and then you can eat anything you want.” That was it. I may have left my politics at the door, but my inner fat triathlete got her chamois in a bunch. See, I know this to be a myth. “Actually, Smedley, that’s unfortunately not true.”
“Oh Yes it is.” Smedley said confidently.
“If that were true,” I responded, “How is it I gained 4 pounds during the 20 weeks I trained for my first marathon?” I couldn’t help myself. “How many calories do you think I burned running 26.2 miles over the course of 5:47 hours? Probably around 3600. Do you know how many calories are in a pound of fat? 3500. All things being equal, without a decent diet, I would need to run 2 marathons a week to drop 2 pounds a week. Maybe more.” I broke into a discussion of the key energy pathways in the body and the ratio of fuel burned at different intensities. Some of the family was genuinely interested however; Smedley clearly was unimpressed with my extensive knowledge of fat metabolism and left the table. I was deeply satisfied. After having spent 3 years as a Clydesdale endurance athlete, I knew what I was talking about. Diet and exercise go hand in hand for weight loss. Later, reflecting on that conversation, I realized something else. For essentially the same reasons, weight loss and performance gains don’t go hand in hand. It is probably why I have been bonking on even short runs and lack the energy to go at a sustained pace for more than 7-8 miles. My caloric intake is hovering around 1500-1600 kcal per day. Even though I have been supplementing my runs with e-gel’s (which I love and highly recommend!) and Amino Vital endurance (also a great product). I simply can’t under cut my calories by that much and continue to push my body in training. It just won’t go. My body feels like I am perpetually in a state of overtraining. My resting HR is up by 4 beats per minute. My HR for a given pace is also up. I’m a little moody (more than usual) and generally unfocused. YIKES! It’s a good thing that I am moving swiftly to my goal weight of 139.

I guess to sum up this really LONG post:

I’m disappointed that I didn’t complete 95% of my scheduled workouts, but that’s history and I can refocus before I need to begin my 2008 racing season.

I’m happy with my running performance gains even if I don’t meet my goal of a sub 90 minute 15K and I wouldn’t trade my weigh loss for a better finish.

I’m ecstatic that I have finally been able to shake of the extra weight. Even though I have a few more pounds to go, I can begin the 2008 season in the best physical shape of my life and fuel my workouts properly to achieve maximum gains.

Finally, Smedley doesn’t know what he is talking about.

I promise to blog after Saturday’s race! Wish me luck.

683 days to Kona 2009.