Week 2 A Special Lesson

So week 2 in in the books!

My goal for this week was to complete 100% of my workouts. I failed. BUT I'M OK WITH THAT!  I had a Divisional Meeting for work which literally sucked the life out of me for 3 days.  I was without a car as our truck broke down in Montauk and stayed there all week.  It was a little challenging.  The workout I blew was saturday's bike.  I was in Montauk getting the car.  I felt a little twinge of guilt/envy when I saw a few brave polar bear rider braving the cold and riding the Montauk Hills, but i'm happy with my week workout wise.  Here it is:

Monday: 40 minute TT for LTHR
Tuesday: off
Wednesday: (was supposed to be a 5k for LTHR, but moved to Friday)
Thursday: 1:00 bike w/ 2X6' very hard
Friday: 5k TT for LTHR
Saturday: Off
Sunday: 50:00 run w/ 4x.5 mile very hard

My LTHR for the bike is 146 BPM (average for 40 min TT)
My LTHR for the run is 157 BPM (average for 5K)

For the bike I fluctuated quite a bit and peaked at 160 BPM
On the run I when I hit about 166 BPM I would need to slow to a walk.  I guess thats my limit right now.

My eating this week was another story entirely - EPIC FAIL.  I just wasn't willing to do the work here.  I admit it.  I could have brought my food to the meeting, avoided the wine during dinner, and cooked instead of going out in Montauk, but i didn't want to.  I lost a measly pound this week and it is probably more than i deserved.  Oh well, there is this week!

I have a poster that Carolynn drew for me at my first olympic triathlon (Chicago 2006) it is hanging up in my pain cave and I stare at it while I ride (cause Coach Troy is not my type;) ).  It has my finish time of 3 hours 46 minutes.  It took forever for me to finish that race.  FOREVER.  I have a goal of completing Quassy in 3 hours.  If I stick to the plan I know I can attain that.

I learned something else really important this week.  My value is not linked to my finish time, or races, or miles, or pace.  Regardless, I am a masterpiece.  If you are wondering, so are you.

Happy training!
J

Week 1A Prepare

Week 1A – Prepare

There is (were) 21 weeks to my first A race, the Olympic Rev3Tri in Quassy, so last week was a preparation week of sorts. I have been out of the regular training discipline for so long I couldn’t see the benefit to jumping into a full blown training week. I used last week to get reacquainted with my bike and the dreadmill.

Monday – 1 hour trainer ride with some harder efforts thrown in

Tuesday – core work

Wednesday – 40 minutes of circuit aerobics and strength moves

Thursday – 5k treadmill steady state

Friday – 1 hour trainer ride with 2 x 6’ very hard efforts 2’ recovery

Saturday – off

Sunday – off

I missed a run workout on Sunday, but no worries or complaints as I start my official week 1 today.

I was also very proud of my eating habits this past week. I’ve shed 4 pounds already with a minimal amount of exercise time, so if I can keep my eating in check, I should see a more progressive weight loss over the next few weeks. I’m holding my caloric intake to around 1650 Kcal/day with a heavy emphasis on veggies and variety. My goal is to race Quassy under 130 pounds. (I haven’t been 130 pounds since the sixth grade.) I’ll also freely admit that while general health and race performance are pieces of my weight loss motivation, I really just want to look good in a pair of size 4 jeans. If that makes me shallow, so be it.

I cooked almost every night last week and it made all of the difference in the world. For the first time in a long time – we planned our weekly menu an shopped for everything we needed. Dinner included: grilled chicken quesadillas, Fish Bruchetta, and a most awesome scallop dish that you can read about here. The best surprise food of the week was Cauliflower CousCous. Click on it and make it (i used shallots not onions and less oil). You won’t regret it.

The week ahead is a baseline testing week starting with a 40 minute TT on the bike tonight and an all out 5k on Wednesday. Both will be used to estimate my LTHR for the next 4 weeks of training. My goal this week is to complete 100% of the workouts this week and eat cleanly despite having a three day long divisional meeting at work. I feel like if I can get through this week with my motivation intact, I am good to go.

Forward motion!

J

In the beginning there was a goal….

In the beginning there was a goal….

As I sit and type this I am acutely aware I am really good at beginning. I have started more projects, assignments, goals, and programs than I can count. I have planned and started many websites, new blogs, and even full blown companies, enough to fill at least a small notebook. Finishing, however, is another story entirely. I finish important things, but a lot of my life is a hodge-podge of loose ends, half built framework, and ultimately, unrealized potential. It irks me. Especially when thinking about all that I have left undone leads me adrift in a sea of daydreaming about what could have been. It’s a hard pattern to break. I usually break it only with a new goal, a fresh start, and yet again another chance to finish what I start.

When I started this blog (which I was very good at), I set forth a goal of finding out what I am really capable of (i.e. finishing what I was starting). I wanted to dream really big and see how far I could reach. The really big dream part (the starting) was easy, the reaching, well not so much. That year I did complete my first half iron tri, which I shouldn’t underestimate, but I did not achieve the consistency of training that would have helped me to achieve a more robust result. In my mind, I have left this goal undone. It’s been dangling over my head for a year and after a good clear conversation with Carolynn, I am ready to re-tackle it. I’m ready to begin again. I want to know what I am really capable of.

The Goal Redefined: To complete an Olympic and Half Iron triathlon, confident I have executed a training program to the best of my ability.

After speaking with Carolynn, I realized I had never trained for an Olympic tri before, much the same way I never trained for a 5k either. I began triathlon with my sights set on ironman and my running career began with an entry into the NYC marathon. I don’t know what it feels like to go fast or to even train for speed. This goal will allow me to back up and experience both of those (hopefully). It will also not occupy 15 hours a week and right now that is a very good thing that will increase my chances of success.

So here they are Rev3Tri Quassy Olympic Rev June 6th and Montauk Mightyman Half Ironman October 2nd. I hope you stay with me for the next 37 weeks. I’ll need the motivation. I’ll post weekly updates and let you know where I’m at and I think (know) that there will be at least one big surprise announcement somewhere along the way.

Week one starts now.

Now, where are my bike shoes?

j

158.8

I have this internal alarm system that goes off when I reach a certain weight.  It's more like a panic button.  When it goes off I usually react by setting huge goals, restricting my calories by an unsustainable amount, and amping up my training.  This rarely works for more that a week or two, but it restarts the graph going in the right direction and usually provides me with the nudge to stay more mindful of the food I eat.  As my body mass has declined in the last few years, so has the alarm number.  First it was 175, then 165, then 160.  

This morning I weighed 158.8 pounds (insert sound of fire alarm).  I am 12 pounds more than I was at this time last year.  Granted, last year I was in the middle of training for my first 1/2 iron tri, putting in 10-12 hours a week and this year I'm not really training for anything, but I'm just really pissed off at myself.  Nothing fits, I'm cranky, and I don't feel good.  So here I am again, planning, blogging, and attempting to mount an internal rebellion over my sweet tooth.  Wish me luck .....

In my favor is a goal and a compelling reason to want to achieve it.  Pretty much the only race I will be doing this year is the NYC marathon on November 1st.  I've done it twice before with completely unsatisfying results.  I swore I would not race it again until I could do so in under 5 hours (with a secret desire to race it under 4:30).  Lugging 30 extra pounds around for 26.2 miles is NOT going to help me achieve that goal.  There are some researchers that attrubute as much as a 5 sec per mile increase in speed for every 2 pounds shed.  If that is the case, I could drop more than a minute off my mile just by losing the weight.  Even if only 1/2 of that is true, I'd unload 13 milutes off my marathon time.  It really is a non-negotiable.  Lose the weight or defer the marathon AGAIN.

 I'm going to start (or re-start) the only way I know how . . . with drastic and immediate changes in my eating habits and my training schedule.  Not being a "small step" kind of person, I'm jumping in waist deep.  I do better with fewer options so i'm going to come up with a list of 3 breakfast choices, 3 lunch choices, 3 small snack options, and 3 basic dinner options.  I'll pick and choose, mix and match, but I will try not to deviate from them.  Since I am not putting in hard training hours, there is no reason to eat more than 1800 Kcal a day, that should put me at about a 600Kcal deficit per day and translate into roughly 1.5 - 2 pounds per week.  I'll add in calories as my marathon training begins in earnest.  The Marathon is 22 weeks away which will put me safely into my goal range of 130 pounds before I hit the starting line.

Today was a decent success.  Here is how my food day broke down:

	Grams	Calories	%-Cals
Calories		1,559
Fat	67.1	598	33	%
Saturated	13.0	115	6	%
Polyunsaturated	10.6	94	5	%
Monounsaturated	10.4	92	5	%
Carbohydrate	243.2	927	51	%
Dietary Fiber	37.7
Protein	78.7	306	17	%
Alcohol	0.0	0	0	%

Not bad for day one, actually a little short of my calorie goal. Ok now only 140 to go!

BTW this great information came from www.fitday.com check it out. It is a very powerful tracking tool (and FREE!)

Open Message to Kevin from the Super Runner's Shop

I just sent this email to Kevin from the Super Runner's Shop in Huntington.   

Hi Kevin,

I was in your store today with a tall attractive redhead, looking to buy her first pair of running shoes.  She's 42 and 18 months out from 6 rounds of chemotherapy for Lymphoma.  She is a newly minted survivor who chose to celebrate by running her first 1/2 marathon with TNT in the fall.  I'm telling you this because you made it a point to remark how big (read fat) she is to be a runner and how much horsepower she would need generate to move.  You did this in front of at least 10 people in the store.  You, Kevin, are a bonehead. 

Carolynn said to me walking back to the car, "Well I guess this will just become one of my running stories, kinda like the one you tell about the the time you went out and a carload of guys that yelled fat slurs at you."  My heart just broke.  She will never forget what you said to her.  Carolynn beat cancer and because of that I'm confident that she won't let your remarks distract her from her goal, however, not everyone that comes into your store will be so resilient.  I owe my current health to running and I was 40 pounds heavier when I started.  Had I experienced what Carolynn did today, I probably would have concluded you were right and gone home to eat my life away.

We won't be shopping at your store again and I won't be sending anyone I know there either.  Having said that, I know some time in the near future an overweight person with walk into your store looking to buy shoes.  For their sake, please don't be a bonehead.

Jennifer Rehm

Grilled Vegetables in Orange Balsamic sauce

This is a really simple but tasty dish, use any veggies you like to grill.  You can also use goat cheese if you prefer and serve over couscous instead of pita. Enjoy!

6 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil

2 tablespoons lemon juice (1 fresh lemon)

1/2 teaspoon dried oregano 

1/2 teaspoon cheveril (optional)

Salt and pepper to taste 

1 large red onion, thickly sliced into rounds 

1 (1-pound) eggplant, cut into 1/2-inch thick slices 

2 medium zucchini or yellow squash, cut into 1/2-inch thick slices 

1 red bell pepper, cored, seeded and cut into 6 pieces 

1 small shallot, finely chopped 

1/2 cup orange juice

2 teaspoons balsamic vinegar

1/3 cup feta cheese crumbles 

1/4 cup chopped fresh parsley

fresh greek style pita (not the kind with the slit in the middle)

Method

Combine 1/4 cup of the oil, lemon juice, oregano and salt and pepper in a large bowl. Add onions, eggplant, zucchini and peppers and toss gently to coat. Cover and refrigerate for 30 minutes, or up to 2 hours, or 10 minutes if that is all you have!

Preheat grill. Arrange marinated vegetables in a single layer on the grill and cook, flipping once, until tender and golden brown, about 10 minutes total. Transfer to a bowl and keep warm.  Tin foil is fine.

Meanwhile, heat 1 tablespoon of the remaining oil in a small saucepan over medium-high heat. Add shallots and cook, stirring occasionally, until translucent, about 3 minutes. Add orange juice and reduce liquid by half, 6 to 8 minutes. Add balsamic vinegar, salt and pepper, then remove from the heat and set vinaigrette aside.  This sauce is amazing for anything! Pour sauce over bowl of grilled veggies.

Brush pita with EVOO an dset on the grill to toast. Portion veggies on to each pita. Generously sprinkle feta over veggie. EAT!

Portion veggies on each pita.

Enough

Enough.

I remember sitting at my desk on December 23^rd and looking at the conference table in my office. I had brought all of Carolynn's Christmas presents in to wrap them and they were on the table. I remember thinking, “Is it enough?” I pulled out a little hand written list of everything I wanted to get her and checked off the items one by one. We had a tight budget this year and there was no jewelry or vacation tickets in the pile. I looked up and again I though, “I hope it is enough.” With that I began to load my car and head home for the holiday.

The holiday was really nice, we had Carolynn's brother's family to our house for dinner. I was really excited to cook a fabulous meal for them. I had laid out an elaborate menu with stuffed shrimp, zucchini patties, fillet mignon, mushrooms, the works. Earlier in the week, Carolynn and I got into a stupid little argument over what I was cooking. I was the stupid one in that I got a little indignant because Carolynn suggested Kenny bring a menu item that I felt infringed on what I was planning to cook. It was really pathetic of me. The little uproar blew over as fast as it came and I found myself looking at the slightly smaller menu thinking, “Is this enough?”

I meticulously laid out my triathlon training schedule for 2009, leaving open the possibility of a late September Ironman. As I was going through the training weeks and building up the miles, I would stop and reflect, “Is this enough?” I anticipate joining some of my training friends on rides and runs, after all that social outlet is a big piece of the sport for me. I couldn't help but project my level of fitness at any given moment and wonder, “If it will be enough?” I built in 4 races before my A race, as I usually do and predictably considered, “Is that enough?”

Enough what?

Over the course of the last few weeks, I have thought about all of the times I use the phrase, “Is it enough?” I use it a lot and I began to realize that what I was really asking is, “Am I enough?” In every case, including my triathlon training the amount of something I was doing or planning seemed to directly correlate with my sense of self worth. Discovery is the first step to understanding. I understand that I have a long way to go when it comes to being satisfied with just being. I can conceptually explain the principles of attachment, suffering, and the absence of existence, but I can't seem to get it through my head the simple truth that, in all cases, places, and situations, I am enough.

Faux-Balance

There are 84 days between the Hyannis marathon and me.  My leg is back to 90% and I’m back to eating well.  I did not run today, but I’ll be ramping back up my running schedule this coming week.  I missed a scheduled 9 miler (not to mention a full week of running), but I’m confident with 12 weeks to go I can pull it off.  After Hyannis, there is Tupper Lake Tri, a handfull of training races, and then .... well, um .... 

I got the new triathlete magazine in the mail yesterday.  I read the article titled “Bookends” first.  It’s very short and talks about the fact that the same coach (Nick White) coached both the first finisher (Craig Alexander) and the very last finisher (Joe Marinucci).  Call me a sap, but I got very choked up reading the juxtaposition of the two men and they day at Kona.  I was equally moved by the fact that Crowie was at the finish line to cheer Joe in and signed his Ironman guide “To the other bookend, well done.”  Name one other sport where the world champion would cheer an average “Joe” on?  I also got very emotional because I thought, that could be me (I mean the one who finishes with only 103 seconds on the clock).  I can’t really put into words why I want to do an Ironman, but when I read a story like this, I feel so drawn to it, inspired by the thought of it.  It makes me feel like I can pretty much do anything.  I looked up at Carolynn and said, “Don’t ever let me give this up.”

As most trifolk, I constantly struggle with balance.  I don’t believe there is a state called balance, by the way, just our endless struggle for it.  It's as if Balance is a desirable thing anyway.  Balance is like a gray zone.  It is just like the imaginary line between cities on a map.  It's there in theory, but can you walk on it?  If you did manage to walk on it, where are you?  You would be nowhere, in neither city, a gray zone.  What makes that a good thing?  I've come to realize that the struggle I have with the idea of balance is more a struggle with presence of mind.

The one thing holding me back from signing up for the Chesapeakeman IM is the fear that I will not be able to keep up the training schedule.  I know that there are plenty of people that have more demanding jobs than I do and less time to devote.  I have a very understanding partner that gives me the latitude to do what I want to do, but how do I overcome the sense of guilt I feel when I step out the door for a 4 hour bike ride (or 5 or 6)?  There is something in my head that gets in the way of being able to separate and partition my time.  When I’m training, all I think about is being home (or occasionally work).  When I am at work or home, I think about training.  I’m obviously not in the moment in either place and consequently, I give off the perception that I would rather be elsewhere.  That’s the problem.  It's not balance, it's presence.  I don't need to learn balance, I need to learn how to be more present in the tasks I have at hand.  If I have set aside training time, I need to be training.  If I have set aside time to be home, I need to be home, both physically and mentally.  Easier said than done. 

A few pages after the “Bookends” article was a letter to the editor titled “Ironman Training and Avoiding Divorce”.  Coincidence? I don’t think so.

Timelines change, Dreams do not

So you may notice I have left my Kona Counter up to the right.  Do I think I can get there in 2009?  I don't know.  I do know that I will get there, so I left it up.

Life happens.  People get sick, injured.  Work demands change.  The stock market slides into the abyss.  So often people will abandon their dreams in amid the chaos of daily life.  When your circumstances change, the dreams and goals you set for yourself can seem like a pinpoint of light in the center of a huge black box.  Whether it is to be a millionaire or an Ironman, setbacks and obstacles are what make the end result that much more prized.  If it were easy, everyone would do it.  How we respond to setbacks and obstacles is what defines and exposes our true character.  

Don't flush your goals just because your timeline has been changed.  Look at it this way: Goals are like a life partner, you need to nurture, support, forgive, and be committed to them, regardless of what life throws at you.  I'll get to kona. Maybe in 2009, maybe in 2029.  My time line is flexible, my goal is not.

Buckeye outdoors - training plans

Hey!

Anyone use BuckeyeOutdoor to log and post training plans?  I'm going to give it a shot and post my first 4 weeks.  I think I can link it here.  

This week has been a total bust.  Work is incredibly busy and I missed my workout today (great week 1 and already behind!) but i am taking the time to really plan my next week.  I really want to do well in Hyannis and I know if i can stay honest and consistent, a 4:30 is in the bag.

It's a sign!

So I ran a 5k in glen cove today, which actually kicked of week 1 of my marathon training for Hyannis.  It was a brand new race and I helped out the race director by donating the finish line food and volunteers from my work.  It was a nice turn out for a first time race; about 200 runners.  The course was uphill for the first 2 miles then down hill for the last.  Very challenging.  I only ran once this week :( and was just looking to do the best I could today.  It would set my benchmark for the next 20 weeks.  I didn't wear a watch, so as i came around the last turn, just before mile 3, I just let it out.  I was running shoulder to shoulder with a woman.  I turned to her and said, "come on and race me!"  We stayed tight right through the finish.  It was actually a lot of fun.  We shook hands at the end and thanked each other for a great finish.  She looked so familiar.  We chatted for a bit and realized that we saw each other at cow harbor 10k a few weeks ago.  It also turns out we have a common friend.  Anyway, as I crossed I looked at the clock, 30:24.  I would have loved to go under 30, but whatever, 30:24 is actually now my PR for a 5K.  I strolled around a bit and said hi to a lot of people and my finish line friend tapped me on the shoulder.  "You finished 3rd in your age group," she said.  Really? me with a 30:24? "No really, I just checked the results."  It was true.  They called my name and I got a medal.  I hate to be a geek here, but it was cool.  There was 12 people in my age group.  The only other time I placed in a race was a 5k where there was only 4 people in my age group.  I was 3rd and #4 was a walker.  I see today's 3rd place as a certain step up from that.

I'm taking this as an omen, a sign from God that I am entering my best season ever with a ton of potential.  I'm in a really good place right now!  (someone may have to remind me about this a few weeks from now.)

Next Steps Forward

OK. I'm ready to move forward, but where? I don't want to wait until next year, so I'm thinking a race is in order.  Since I bailed on NYC this year, I want to race a mary.  I really want to race one under 5 hours (closer to 4:30 actually).  How about a winter marathon?

I started surfing marathonguide.com and other sites and found the Hyannis Marathon.  February 22, 2009 in Hyannis, Massachucetts.  And guess what? It is just 21 weeks away!  Perfect!  I'm in.  That's it, my next step.  Plan to follow.

Starting over, again

Sometimes the only way forward is to back up.

Obviously, I haven't posted in a while.  I had a really awesome time at the Tupper Lake Tinman 1/2 ironman in June.  I finished the race in 7 hours and 14 minutes.  I was happy with that.  It was my first 1/2 and even though it was 14 minutes more than I had wanted, it was fine.  The run was horribly hot and I still had the remnants of an upper respiratory infection.  I finished and I was happy.  You can check out the pics here: Tupper Lake Pictures

My plan was to finish tupper, take off 2 weeks, train for Mightyman 1/2 ironman and the NYC marathon.  I was feeling very strong as I cruised into Tupper Lake.  I had had the best season ever to that point.  Within 2 weeks back from Tupper things began to change.  I was training, but not enjoying it.  My mood began to disintegrate.  My health began to fall apart too.  I felt sick all the time and my training was getting harder to complete.  I could have been over training, but I dialed back a lot.  Even to the point of taking 2 and 3 rest days to try to get my strength back.  There is a difference between tired and exhausted.  I was exhausted.

Perpetually exhausted and unable to train, I finally went to the doctor.  Was it a lack of b12? Anemia? a virus? Cancer (yes, I thought that)?  My Doc is terrific.  He gave me a full physical and ran every blood test available.  He even gave me a b12 shot.  Three days later he called.  "Jen, you are the picture of perfect health."

Now I could laundry list all of the things in my life that have been putting stress on me; work just sucked, Carolynn was facing her 1 year-out-of-chemo PET scan, I needed a breast biopsy, money was getting tighter, but I didn't feel like any of that was in anyway harder than the year before.  I couldn't make sense of it.  When Carolynn started to use words like "fragile" to describe the state I was in, I knew I was heading down a very scary path.  One I've been down before.  I was heading into (or already in) a depression.  

Three years ago I went on effexor at the suggestion of my doctor because I was experiencing very high anxiety and depression.  It helped me tremendously and allowed me to take back my life, get through the rough patch, and eventually come off the medication.  This time i wasn't experiencing the anxiety, but even with the depression, I did not want to go on medication again.  Don't get me wrong.  I wasn't sitting around crying everyday and I did have a quite "typical" affect most of the time.  I even had a few really good days, but I knew something was wrong and I also knew I couldn't think my way out of it.  It can be very scary.  Thank God for Carolynn.  So patient with me through all of this.  She never got mad or lost her temper.  I knew she was worried about me.  I still can't say exactly what brought me out of it, but I have to believe she had a lot to do with it.

It seemed like after the doctor called with his good health dx and my breast biopsy came back negative, I started to improve.  Carolynn encouraged me to start taking more vitamins which included l-tryptophan at bed time.  I made the decision to run the cow harbor 10K despite the fact that I hadn't trained for it, mostly because I needed the camaraderie.  That went well, all things considered and by some miracle, I shaved a minute off my best time on that course.  Then there was last Friday.  It was raining.  I wanted to go for a run.  I did.  I forgot how much I enjoyed running in the rain.  I felt like my old self again.  Back at my house after 3 wet miles, I sat on my stoop and thought, "Well to go forward from here, I've got to start back at the beginning again."

Here I am.  Back at the beginning and ready to move forward again. 

Milestones

Milestones aren’t always personal records or huge significant events. What constitutes a one persons milestone is a very personal thing. Actually, how we define forward movement along any given path we travel says a lot about what’s important to us, how we feel about our journey, and sometimes, what we see as points of no return. None the less, milestones, like mile markers in a race, break life into digestible pieces. Some miles are good, others maybe not so much.

Here are my milestones at the middle of week 4 in my 20 week half iron distance training program:

I made it this far.
I got through my first real brick workout with minimal discomfort
I ran my first double digit LSD 2 weeks earlier than planned
I missed my first workout due to overdoing a previous one and frying my legs (See above for reference)
I had my first back/neck strain from my swim form collapsing during a longish set
I paid my money and locked in entry for the Tupper Lake Tinman ½ Iron man, NYC marathon, and Gold Coast Triathlon

There they are. Some good, some not so good, some points-of –no-return, all represent forward motion of my goals.

There have been times in a race, especially early on in long ones, when I barely notice the mile markers. I have often thought to myself that was a good thing. It meant that I was doing my thing and not obsessing about where I was at any given moment. Towards the end though, I am waiting (maybe praying) to see the markers on the horizon. As in, “Where the hell is mile 23!!!!” I’m a triathlete, a marathoner! I crave the passing of mile markers. It’s like a drug. When they don’t come on the schedule I want, I begin withdrawal symptoms; restlessness, slight panic, and despair. Then boom, my mile marks shows up and all is well with the world.

When you do something for a long time and you don’t see forward motion or progress as quickly as you want, you can get pretty desperate in your thinking. I have recently found this applies to everything thing in life; including work. It takes a funny mix of drive and patience not to make yourself crazy trying to balance forward movement of your career (or project, or department) and the delay we often encounter in meeting self imposed milestones. It’s like getting yourself to put one foot in front of the other at mile 20-something with no sign of a mile marker anywhere. You just have to trust it’s out there ahead of you. You have to trust the route you have chosen. You have to be in the moment of the journey, where you are. In life, business, relationships, and races, each step can be a milestone. Some good, some not so good, some points-of –no-return, all represent forward motion.

Base Training AH-HA!

Three weeks into my training season and I can say that I've had my first AH-HA! moment (I hope Oprah didn't trademark that)

Every base season, I struggle with the idea of "easy". Being a back of the packer, "easy" often means walking or spinning away and huffing at 12.5 miles/hour. Over the past three of my "athletic years" I have struggled coming out of the off season and my first week of training is a walk and barely a ride. It was the right thing however for where I was at. I typically ignored the right thing and I plowed into training, strapping my garmin on from my very first run and obsessing over my pace. OK so we all know how that turns out. I fry myself, get injured, or work harder to make less gains. It's also important to note that each of my previous off seasons have been twice as long (like nothing from November to February) and I typically gain 10 pounds (on top of the extra 25 I've held on to forever). You can just imagine the disaster and disappointment that made up my base seasons of yester-year.

This year is decidedly different for me. First, my off season was only 4 weeks and I threw in a few unscheduled workouts during that time. Second, instead of gaining 10, I lost 20. I also set myself up for a great season with high expectations and a good mindset. This year I have yet to take my garmin out of the drawer. All of my training to this point has been by feel. I've walked a little, i've eased up on the gearing if I needed to, held back on the wall an extra 10 sec if necessary. Some days I have virtually fallen asleep at the dinner table. Even though I think I am on the right track, I really miss the sense of progress and feedback you get from the pace/HR monitor. Today was an AH-HA for me and it came in the form of a brick.

I was scheduled for an ez 45 minute ride followed by an ez 15 minute run. It was freezing cold this morning and I am a total sissy, so I opted for a 6:30 spin class and the treadmill. I have been doing all of my riding at home on the trainer using the spinerveral DVD's. Most of them have been pretty tough, strength focused workouts. I work through them, burning my legs longer than my lungs.

I got to spin class with good energy. The class was very aerobic, lots of out of the saddle, high spinning, only a few climbs in the seat. I was going to stop at 45 minutes, but I felt really, really great and hung in for the full 60 (65 with my warm up). I worked up a sweat and put in a solid effort. I got right off and hopped on a treadmill in the adjacent room. Started at a very conservative 11:00/mile. My legs felt great. I started to increase the speed every minute until I topped out at 9:20/mile and ended my 15 minutes actually wishing I could go longer! It was like an early season win. AH-HA! Base training does work!

Check out http://noslackers.blogspot.com/ and post your AH-HA workouts to comments!

The Myth of Organization

Organization is not one of my hard wired traits. It is actually a discipline that I have had to learn, and re-learn, and learn again. Because this triathlon season is so important to me, I decided to dedicate a lot of effort this year to organizing; my time, my gear, my clothes, my life. I know that to achieve my goals, I need to execute my training plan consistently and I need to "fit it all in".
I dusted off my franklin covey day planner, bought some shiny new highlighters, blocked out a chunk of time each day to schedule and re-shuffle my schedule, I am determined to be organized. All in an effort to flow from one activity to another, achieving all of my appointments, workouts, and tasks. I even color coded chunks of my day to correspond to my priorities. I actually enjoy the intellectual pursuit of trying to fit 30 hours of crap into a 24 hour day! Plan, plan, plan! With all of this organization I should be super productive and highly effective. Right? After all if "fail to plan is a plan to fail" then "plan to succeed is a successful plan"

Why then am I left at the end of each day, discouraged and disappointed that my to do list is not done and I find that I'm doing yellow labeled priorities in pink highlighted time slots? I'm not enjoying the execution part. I don't find I have any more time and I'm not doing any more than I was before (except maybe more scheduling). So what gives?

Well, to start, you can't fit 30 hours in a 24 hour day AND you shouldn't try. Just being organized and planning up the wazoo won't help you with the execution part! I guess I had a little of my demon creeping up on me. Just because I think I "SHOULD" do or be something doesn't mean what I am right now isn't good enough. Trying to over-organize my highly un-organized spirit, it was like trying to teach a frog to fly. I need a little of the haphazardness of my life back. I need to get back in touch with my inner frog! When will I get this through my thick head?!

I'm throwing out my highlighters tomorrow!

I've been a little remiss in posting here! Sorry bout that.

Here I am in week 19 and my training is going well. My legs are feeling tight and strong. I'm anxious to get on the road. I've screwed up my swims though just haven't been able to get them done ;-(

I can't say I've been myself lately though. My mood has been, well, bipolar to say the least. I usually have a high threshold for stress and that fuse is significantly shorter these days. I'm snapping quite frequently and my usual funny sarcasam has taken on a bite. I know that it could be training and nutrition related. I have a similar personality misfire when I go off carbs for more than 2-3 weeks, but it is so early in the season and I'm not carb restricting so I'm hoping it will go away. If it doesn't I might end up single!

It could be I just need a vacation. It's been exactly a year since my last one. Probably too long.

601 days to Kona 2009.
No i don't have a spot......YET!

Oh My Aching Piriformis!

Ouch.

My piriformis muscle on my left side is KILLING me. I swapped out my hill repeats for a strength building spinervals DVD. When I got on the treadmill tonight to do a hill workout WOW it let me know it was angry!

I streched well tonight and will use some trigger point therapy later on.

If you are interested, I set up a blog called "No Slackers". You can catch it on the right. I will post my daily workout there and if you want to follow along you can have it emailed to you. Beyond that, I would find it most encouraging if you post your daily workout to the comments. I always like to know that I'm not out there alone. Let's just keep it nice. No trash talking. As far as I'm concerned if you show up, put in 100%, I don't care if you walked a mile or ran a marathon. It's all good. Just post it to keep motivated. Pass it along to whoever you like. Runners, Walkers, Triathletes, Whatever....... just no slackers.


605 days to Kona 2009

Week 20: Training begins today!

I’ll be posting my weekly workout schedule if anyone wants to comment. There are exactly 20 weeks to Tupper Lake so here is week 20:

Tuesday
Swim: 2x200 warm up, 8x25/20sec, 2x200 cool down
Bike: 5 mile warm up, 8x30sec hill repeats, 5 mile EZ pace

Wednesday
Swim: 10x100 drills
Run: 1 mile warm up, 8x30sec hill repeats/1 min recovery, 1 mile cool down

Thursday
Brick: 45 minute bike, 15 minute run EZ pace

Friday
Swim: 2x200 warm up, 8x25/20sec, 2x200 cool down
Bike: 30 minute tempo ride

Saturday
Bike: 60 minute
Run: 30 minute

Sunday
Run: 50 minutes
Swim: 1100 meters

And how does my first day go?!? The ONLY snow all year and slip sliding on my way to the JCC (I didn’t make it)! I swapped the hill repeat workout with a strength building Spinervals DVD and will make up my Swim on Thursday AM. Good enough. Work has been tragically hectic and I need to focus on getting everything in this week. I can do it.

BTW, I got a new bike. Not new in the actual sense, just new to me. It is a Fuji Aloha and I picked it up for pennies on ebay. I also snagged a new ultegra rear derailuer and 10 speed cassette for less than 100 bucks. I am so good to go.

Happy Training All!
140 days to Tupper Lake
606 days to Kona 2009

I'm BAAAAAACK!

I’m Baaaaaaack!

My season officially kick starts on February 10 with day one of a 20 week half iron distance training plan. I have been completing transitional workouts to get geared up for the schedule. Mostly just for time and mostly just to get into the habit of working out again. I am both excited and apprehensive about the next 10 months. Excited because I feel like I am in the best possible position to see what I am truly capable of and apprehensive (or petrified) because I know that the success or failure of my season depends all on me.

The weirdness that was 2007 gave me some important insights into who I am as an athlete. I discovered that completing races just to tick them off a list and prove that I could was not meaningful for me. I also came to terms with the fact that if you never really risk anything, you never really gain anything – physically, emotionally or otherwise. What better way to start off the new training season with new questions?

Am I ready to take some risks?

Will I risk setting aggressive goals knowing that I might not reach them?
Will I risk executing an aggressive training plan knowing that it might create conflicts with other people and priorities in my life?
Will I risk participating in challenging workouts with my friend and teammates knowing that I might be the “last one up the hill”?

As I start to answer these questions, I realize that it all comes down to fear. What do I deeply fear? We have all read stories about endurance athletes that talk about “out running” their demons and fears. From time to time, I’ve even been asked, “What are you running from?”

My demons? Primarily there is only one. She is the demon that keeps trying to convince me that I am not enough. It’s not self doubt. She is much more complicated than that. Her main function is to express my duty or the necessity to be more than I am right at this moment. She is the voice that says,”You should be faster or smarter or thinner or whatever.” I have been running to get away from her. I have always visualized her behind me, egging me on and taunting me. I am beginning to see that image hasn’t really worked for me because she is always there. I never really get rid of her. Even in my best performances, she is still there. It kind of reinforces the fact that I will never be good enough because as soon as I stop or slow she catches me. What a buzzkill! I think that we have a choice about how we look at this metaphor. Either you can try to out run your demons OR you can chase them down and kill them.

This year I am sending her out ahead of me. She will be my rabbit. I will chase her every time I get in the pool, or on the bike, or when I lace up my running shoes. Each day I prepare to accomplish the work laid out ahead of me, I will bring to the table everything I am at that moment. It will be in the accomplishing that I will chase her down and in the finishing that I will get rid of her.

So, what is behind me and pushing me along?

I need to live the longest-healthiest life possible, to be with the people I love and give as much back as I possibly can.

I need to “put it all on the line” often enough to know what I am truly capable of at that moment in time and because I like to be seen as capable by other people

I need to achieve something tangible every day and not feel guilty about it

I have a strong desire to do things that are significant and not feel guilty about that either

I have a great 2008 season planned but I need to execute with focus and consistency. I won’t get there if I let my demon chase me all season. I am going to try to keep focused on the four points above and draw on how they make me feel for my motivation. When all else fails, I will remind myself that just showing up with 100% makes me enough.